These things are invariably made by people younger and/or more stupid than the average /bun/ denizen.
- 4chan is not a lifestyle, it's just a website. If you feel the need to 'quit it' because of the impact it's having on your life then you've got more shit going on than simply stopping going there would fix.
- I didn't know that 'alpha' meant 'being generally healthy' these days. I must be behind the times.
- Getting a job is not something that anyone can help you with, short of them physically offering you employment.
- lol girlfriends. Sex is not the holy grail these charts always seem to assume people believe it is; it's fun and all I guess, but nowhere near worth the hassle of a relationship. If you're in it for the companionship instead then must have some shitty friends, I'd suggest fixing that before you go looking for a girl.

tl;dr Why would someone willingly browse /r9k/?

>before puberty kicked in
Haha, I already felt like shit back then.

Did they make one that tells you how to find more time for reading VNs?